Love, Lust and the Longing for God

The final book in the Longing series is now available — combining the complete text of my three previous books. It is a powerful tool for personal transformation.

In The Secret of Emotions I explained how to understand the spiritual meaning behind our emotional sensations and offered a whole new vocabulary for understanding the language of the heart. In 4 Tools of Emotional Healing I used this language to explore the healing potential of Honesty, Forgiveness, Compassion and Faith and offered practical guidance as to how to apply them to our daily lives. In Longing for Love I applied this unique understanding of emotions to the question of how to find and nurture healthy relationships, while avoiding shame-based relationships and addictive or compulsive acting out.

Now all three of these life-lessons are available in Love, Lust and the Longing for God, a single volume that will be equally useful for individuals trying to understand their life challenges and therapists trying to explain the subtleties of the healing process to their clients.

We All Have Faith in Something

We all have faith in something. The question is whether we have faith that we will succeed, or faith that we will fail; faith that the world is a safe place, or faith that it is out to get us; faith that there is meaning to our lives or faith that the universe is a great cosmic accident in which we are just a tiny blip.
We also all believe in a Transcendent Higher Power, no matter how vehemently we try to deny it. This belief began before we were even born and was reinforced every day of our lives for the duration of our emotional development.
We are born helpless and dependent upon adults who had much more power than we did. We believe, to the very core of our subconscious beings, that there is a power outside of us that is greater than we are because we experienced such a power every day of our early lives. Our feelings of helplessness and powerlessness were therefore embedded in our emotional reality at birth. They are the foundational scaffolding upon which our early emotional and intellectual world-views were built.
Our pre-verbal awareness that as infants we were subject to the whims of forces more powerful than ourselves was reinforced by at least 10-15 years of additional experiences during our childhood and youth. It would be unrealistic to think we could erase these feelings from our psyches. No matter what our head tells us, our hearts tell us that there is something bigger than us out there. It would do no good to engage in an intellectual argument with our hearts over whether or not there is a God.

If we resign ourselves to the idea that a part of us will always believe in a Higher Power, we can still do three things. First, we can accept that our hearts will always long for a source of power, strength and protection. This is not a sign of weakness; it is simply a universal aspect of the human condition.
Second, we can work to uncover what our subconscious and emotional beliefs about that Higher Power might be. We will always believe in a force bigger than ourselves, but we can wrestle some power back from it by being able to name it and describe how it has influenced us.
Finally, we can use this use this understanding to slowly redefine our Higher Power, both mentally and emotionally, to be more supportive and loving. Instead of denying or doing battle with the Higher Power we grew up with, we can transform it; educate it; turn it into the loving Force that we need it to be in our hearts.